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Orange Crush
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If you like boring stories but like to read, continue on...

I was looking for a another car so me and my wife didn't have to share the only one we had 09 Hyundai Santa Fe. We came up with the money to buy me a car, so we started looking. I started looking for a Tib, found one right away, it was silver. The interior was impeccable, looked like nobody used it, the exterior, completely diferent story. It looked really bad, paint chipping, pealing, rims were all scratched, etc. They wanted way to much money too. Pass. Then I changed gears and started looking for an Eclipse then. I searched for a year for the one I wanted. Thank God I did.

My wife was helping me with the search. One day she is like,
"Hey, have look at those tiburons? they look NNiiiccEEee".
I said "That's what I wanted originally".
She said, "Well I found some with in the budget". (I was at work when all this was happening).

She sent me some links for me to look at over my "breaks" at work. Most of them were pass,pass,pass, maybe, then there she was...
Sitting on a "rinky dink mom pop dealer" in the middle of nowhere, waiting for me to go get her. I immediately called the guy. He talked faster than "Speedy Gonzales on crack". The only thing I got was the price and the fact she had a new $1000? (Doubt it) clutch job put in.

That same week, I had to go near by that place (1 hour away, 2 hours from home. Shhhh... YES NEAR BY) for work reasons with my boss. I went. On the way there, I had my friend (Who works at a local Hyundai dealership) run a background check on this car. He e-mailed the Autocheck to me. It was involved in a minor rear end collision, otherwise clean but instructed me on how to negotiate the price for it cause it was too much. Finally I got there, I felt like a kid picking up the girl to go on a date. Nervous as$ $hit for some reason (come on man, is just a car, YEAH BUT I WANT IT, so moving on). So, I went inside and asked they guy for the keys (I had already called him to tell him I was on my way). Walked to her and there she was, all covered in dirty ol' Pennsylvanian winter salt spray, mud and snow. She was at the edge of the road, with other old american cars and trucks. They just plowed a few days before, she was all covered in crud.

Opened her up, smelled like a grease monkey had sex with old leaky v8, but cleaned and shined up with about 2 galons of "armor all", this crap was everywhere. Lots of TLC needed, I said. No biggie, that's what I'm here for. Opened the hood, looked at the engine and under, looked dirty as$ $hit too. Good, cause I was looking for the bad stuff and if it was cleaned I wouldn't know. So, engine bay checked ok. No leaks, new parts, or other new stuff indicating problems or raising questions. Everything dead stock.

Then the time came...

Me-- Time to fire her up (Started to sweat). Inserted the key and turned it and...Nothing.
My Pea Brain-- The clutch you dumb as$. Press on the clutch!!!!
Me-- OK, ok, ok.
Push on the clutch and,
Brrooommmm, she went. Followed by tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick.
Time to check the engine again I said! I looked and listened and couldn't see anything abnormal, I was listening for things other than the horrible "Knocking, tick, tick, tick".
Nothing!!!, nice and smooth.

Time to ride her. Got in, look at the shifter and saw the "reverse" is all the way to the right.
--Ok, sweet, I'm used to that. None of that weird as$ reverse where 1rst gear should be.
--Glunk, glunk went the stick.
-- Ok is in reverse. (Or so I thought.)
--Revs up and here we go, car wants to move forward? What?
--Ok, glunk neutral, glunk reverse.
--Lets try again, revs up, release clutch and... car wants to go forward.
I tried it about 6 more times, thinking, am crazy? Till I gave up. Turn her off, went back to the guy and said (very frustrated) "can't get it in reverse, I don't know WTF is wrong with it".
He said (with a smirk on his face) "Did you pull on the ring BEFORE putting it on reverse?"
I was like "What ring?" (With a slap on my face how old I am, and how cars have changed since my stick shift days. Plus I've only driven stick Toyota all my life.)
He explained to me the whole boot ring reverse thing. (I know inside his head he was like "NOOOOOOBB, Palm on forehead" this idiot better not wreck this car). And don't forget its going to pull hard with that new clutch.

Like a total noob, I went back out to see what this "ring" was.
So... Time to give this a try again.
Ok, Where is that dammed ring he is talking about? Top of the shifter boot, he said? Is it this plastic thing? Pulled on it and BOOM figure it out. SWEEEEETTTT yay I got it. "Gosh" My brain said.
Brooommm, here we go again. Huh?... "Tick" went away?... Interesting!!!
Off we went, holly **** this is awesome. 1rst gear, 2nd gear, 3rd gear and there goes the speed limit sign (35), Oh $hit, I'll better slow down. I haven't been this excited since... Well... Long time ago, lets leave it at that. Hahahahaha.

Time to turn around and go back to the dealer.
I'm trying this again, buahahaha.
Floored it... She didn't hesitated and took off, pulled through 1rst, 2nd, 3rd and 4th I had to let go (I was doing 70ish on a 35, reality sunk in and WWOOOOOOoooooshhhh I went pass the dealership. Oh crap, ok, slow down, turn around and lets do this deal.

Pulled into the dealership and the darn knocking came back. Tick, tick, tick, tick she was. Quickly pulled my phone and searched google. "Tiburon knocking", Oh look at that, a website dedicated to tiburones(<---Spanish plural for tiburon).
Enter Awesome website.
Huh? They have a forum too. Sweet.
Oh look a "Sticky" about engine knocking.
"USE OEM OR HIGH QUALITY OIL FILTER" numerous times, in ten seconds, I read.
Then I got out and I quickly popped the hood, looked for the oil filter...
And, bam, there it was, a brand new shiny orange "fram" cheap as$ crappy filter.
My pea brain reminded me -- "Oh yeah, he mentioned he did a new oil change too."

Closed the hood, turned her off and inside I went. (Time to close this deal)
He asked, "Well, watcha' think?"
"Let make a deal" I said
He said, List price is this, I want this and is yours. No negotiation that's what I want for it, no bs, if or buts.
I said, ok, no bs, if and buts this is all I have. Cash period, the engine is knocking, the blue book says this, you didn't wanted to give me a "carfax" (I already got it from a friend remember?) because of the rear collision. Blah,blah bla.
He said "Sorry, I can't let it go for that. It has a $1000 clutch job, blah, blah, blah..."
I said with a broken heart, ok. Sorry, thanks for your time and have a good day. Started walking towards the door... Looking at the car. And then... He said,
Wait..., let me check something. (With a calculator on his hands). You can have it for that price, but how about all the taxes, tags and fees?
I said, "This is all I got" cash in hand.
"OK, Fiiinnneee" he said. "Its "as is" no warranty, but you can rest assured its in good shape. He kept going on about the darn clutch job and how his wife used the car in the last couple of days. (I guess she was the grease monkey with the 2 galons of "armor all")
At that point, I didn't care. I had a good cushion to fall back if anything went wrong with the car.(price was $2000 under blue book value in that condition)
Oh crap, I remembered I didn't check the "sunroof", so I asked him. He said "NooPE, it doesn't work. And I don't know whats wrong it" with a pissed off tone.

After the adoption paperwork was done, I got the keys again and it was time to head home.

To be continued... Haven't proof it yet. Sorry for the errors.
2006 Hyundai Tiburon (Orange Crush)



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